At the tender age of 62 I can safely say that I have wasted a lot of time, energy, and love on the wrong people for the wrong reasons. I been working with people for over 35 years and one of the biggest pieces of advice I can give is “If someone doesn’t treat you well, don’t spend time with them”.

It’s not just me who says this. Ask people over 40 and they will say that one of the resounding lessons life has taught them is this: Create Better Boundaries. Know it’s ok to say no. Spend more time with better people. Seems self-evident, you’d think. And yet, how come we don’t do this, but end up hanging out with people who drain us, criticise us, undermine our sense of ourselves, don’t have our best interests at heart?

Yes, it’s great to be open to new experiences, new learning, looking for the opportunity. But… have strong boundaries. Know your values. Value yourself enough to not tolerate bad behaviour, meanness, dependency, mediocrity, people who take and don’t give back, people who don’t want and see the best in you, people with whom you don’t flourish .

If you’re in the friendship to fix them, change them, out of obligation, or “should”, because you don’t want to risk upset, or hurting their feelings, reflect for a moment on the damage you do to yourself by not surrounding yourself with those who truly support you on your path. One of these gems is worth 100 of the other. Fill your life with diamond people.

This is a major part of learning to win at The Inner Game of Health.