A recent study looked into stress levels at home and at work in men and women. It measured stress, not by subjective reporting but by sampling the level of cortisol in saliva at different times during the day. The results were surprising.

Whilst men seemed to experience being at home as less stressful than women, the pattern was the opposite among a large percentage of the women in the survey. It seemed women felt more stressed at home than at work.

Looking more closely at the subjective aspects, this study linked the sense of being valued and receiving appreciation as the key factor. At work , women felt that their contributions were acknowledged and rewarded, if only financially. At home it seems many women feel undervalued and overworked.

At recent study in the States linked the sense of being valued with stress. When employees felt valued, their job satisfaction level shot up to 92%. Only 29% of people who reported not feeling valued found their work satisfying. Work satisfaction correlates directly with stress. This is the chronic drip, drip, drip effect of being in a job that doesn’t fulfil certain basic human criteria, such as respect and being valued.

In my work , I often talk with people who feel exhausted and unhappy, even depressed, and think there is something wrong with them. On closer inspection, it turns out that their job is a major source of dis-ease, not just lack of being valued but more overt signs of being bullied that they themselves haven’t recognised. As is often the case with bullying, especially subtle bullying, the victim feels to blame.

Here are some common forms of workplace intimidation that can cause unnecessary stress and
misery. If you experience any of these at work or at home, take action, see someone, seek help.

• false accusations of mistakes and errors
• hostile glares and other forms of non-verbal intimidation
• yelling, shouting and screaming
• exclusion and the silent treatment
• withholding resource and information necessary to do the job
• behind the back sabotage and defamation
• use of put-downs, insults and excessively harsh criticism
• unreasonably heavy work demands designed to ensure failure.